Departed legend Hunter S. Thompson dispensed one of the greatest and most obscure pieces of advice within his short story, “Sugarloaf Key: Tales of the Swine Family”, that has applicable prowess within the contemporary jungle of social network information chaos.
“The moral of this story is Never Let Strangers Get Their Hands on the Key to Your Meat Locker. And also, Get Out While You Can.”
A singular offspring of NBA great Moses Malone, Moses Malone, Jr., should have heeded this wisdom and left his $50 thousand neck chain on the nightstand, before he was attack and robbed by a group of 15 passionate fans in front of a Houston strip club last June. Luckily for Malone, he did not encounter a severed pig’s head face up in the toilet wearing lipstick. According to Click 2 Houston.com, the motivation for the assault on the son of the basketball immortal, was an online post judiciously and gently pushing constructive criticism toward Houston Rocket’s iconic bearded star James Harden, who ironically was a regular connoisseur of the artistic accents of the gentlemen’s establishment. Four men were arrested, including a bouncer at the club, and charged with aggravated robbery with a deadly weapon. While the moral of the story for Malone Jr. is, “Do not post content that could be construed as disrespectful in thug culture and immediately visit the strip club where the star player is a reigning VIP. And also, Get Out While You Can,” the story thankfully does not end here.
In a true testament to the arcane and the delightfully convoluted, Malone Jr., has apparently filed a lawsuit against Harden, claiming that all-star planned and coordinated the orgy of violence and subsequent heist, which included the before mentioned $50 thousand neck chain (Why an adult male is donning personal jewelry of this magnitude and luxury deserves a separate column). CBS Sports reports that Malone is claiming that Harden facilitated and funded the strategic attack at the now defunct strip joint with $20 thousand, to avenge social media criticism over the cost of youth summer basketball camps. Of course the legal team for Harden is vehemently denying and wrong doing and the fee for the camps still stands at $249. While there is no word yet as to the future status of Harden’s lucrative endorsement contracts, the image of the prolific scorer has been tarnished with the reality of his post-game choice of confections and venue of entertainment where he paid thousands of dollars to have his beard tugged on.
Read the Click 2 Houston story here.
Read the CBS Sports story here.