Nobody is coming for your guns. Nobody just wants you to register them so, you know . . . so he knows where they are because . . . because if he knows where they are then, he can keep us safe. It is after all his responsibility to keep us safe.
As a matter of fact, Nobody is responsible for a lot of things we wouldn’t understand. He must insure our health, our wealth, our freedom, our well being and it looks like he’s even going to start taking care of our religions for us.
More than anything else, the one insurmountable task Nobody has graciously agreed to undertake for us, is equality. Nobody has taken it upon himself to insure that no American is deprived of anything; equal income, equal housing, equal safety, equal neighborhoods, equal health, equal phones, equal lives.
This is so much better that equal opportunity. Opportunity requires effort. His plan produces equal results. No matter what you do, you get more. And nobody knows better than Nobody how to do this.
With Nobody’s incredible equality plan Americans will soon be able to do less and less to get more and more. Before long we will have to do nothing to get everything. Some Americas have already reached this pinnacle. Yes, it’s working already!
There was a time when Americans would be glad to do anything to get anything. It was called survival. Then things improved until we were willing to do anything to get something. It felt good. Before long we were able to choose to do something to get anything. And not long afterward we finally arrived at the point where we simply had to do something to get something. It was called . . . life.
Then, just when we thought life couldn’t get any better, some of us discovered a way to get something without doing anything. Before long, more and more people had discovered this nirvana and soon Nobody, in his infinite wisdom, devised a way for us to get almost anything by doing almost nothing. It was called . . . equality.
If we keep this up everyone will soon be equal, Nobody will have everything, and everybody will have nothing. It’s called . . . never mind what it’s called, but it has never ever in the history of mankind produced anything but poverty.
“The Only Place Equality Exists Is At The Bottom.”
Watch Out For Nobody, He Is Coming For Your Guns . . .
source: The Federalist Papers, Wikipedia