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Shooting For The Moon- Local Ice Cream Chain Goes Full Anti-Cop

July 17, 2020 By Conn Williamson

molly moon’s ice cream owner Molly Moon Neitzel is apparently wary of cops.  

Based on historic precedent, Seattle always has to make international headlines during a pandemic. As the Covid-19 virus has already altered everyday life into the worst dream-nightmare sequence of SoCal Orange County cougar addicted to plastic surgery gaudily pouting in the mirror after 56 procedures, the CHOP/CHAZ autonomous zone was founded by vigilant rioters. During the 1918-1920 Spanish Flu pandemic, the city’s professional hockey franchise tied for the Stanley Cup by simply remaining healthy enough throughout the regular season in fighting attrition. The series against the Montreal Canadians marks the only time in hockey’s legacy that a champion was not officially declared.

While the CHOP/CHAZ fiasco coined by supporters as the “Summer of Love”, in reality the anti-establishment anti-law enforcement abomination representing a failure in all levels of leadership was a nightmarish street fair of violence and crime, which left four dead in nine days, before the City Council grew a temporary spine and ordered the putrid and degradative social experiment dismantled. Oddly enough, lawmakers and health officials failed to lambaste the presence of large crowd gatherings in the vortex of a public health crises, nor was the Governor’s misguided though official mandate limiting congregations of over 50 individuals enforced. Politics were prioritized over safety and security, and the police faced the brunt of scrutiny and downright nastiness from Black Lives Matter supporters, as well as a disheartening onslaught from local businesses.

The Moai statue shape of CHOP/CHAZ with molly moon’s location indicated by the blue dot.

In the aftermath of the gratuitous ten days of civil unrest and anarchy, the Seattle City Council is threatening to cut the law enforcement budget by 50%, and a local confectionary chain has turned sour in the divisive and charged climate of visceral politics and contrived hate. The owner of molly moon’s ice cream, which has eight locations around the region, has gone on full attack mode of police, after a tourist from California ordered $500 worth of ice cream to distribute among the law enforcement patrolling the streets of the proximal Capitol Hill neighborhood. After officers picked up the order to disperse amongst colleagues, frozen treat proprietress, Molly Moon Neitzel, posted a sign on the front on the front window of her shop reading, “Police Officers: molly moon’s is a gun free zone please do not come inside if you are wearing a firearm.”  The notice also identified the ice cream parlor as a “Gun free zone”. Customers can now be ensured that their well- being is overshadowed by rhetoric spawned by cognitive dissonance. This is ice cream for gosh sakes.

The now viral image of the sign in front window of Molly Moon’s Capitol Hill establishment.

Of course, Neitzel’s Pacific Northwest style of passive aggressive snark in attempting to dehumanize cops and gun owners created an instant controversy, and muddled the fact that the shop was located in the temporary borders of the CHOP/CHAZ domain, and potentially supplied rogue dissidents with flavorful treat breaks between the destruction of public property, battery, and the consumption of recreational drugs. Interestingly, she advised employees through a June memo, to avoid demonstrating in Black Lives Matter organized events.

In response to Neitzel’s egregious and unsavory actions, the once popular group of ice cream dispensaries faces the wrath of frustrated consumers voting with their wallets, and a plausible global social media backlash against the dirty politics of mixing dessert with ideology. The owner of molly moon’s is no stranger to combining a narrow-minded agenda with a business model, and regularly posts content is outside the realm of normal parameters. She has the right to serve who she chooses, as well as right to free speech, however, but how does it benefit a business to pile on the already beleaguered women and men of law enforcement, who face an almost impossible climate of intolerance, blatant vitriol, and a choreographed and insidious effort to eliminate policing? There exists apolitical and less expensive options that support firearms and policing, rather than being subject to the tirades of an activist disguised by incredulous scoops of peanut butter chocolate crammed in a waffle cone. Some people never learn the fine line between being getting their message heard, and enough is enough.  

The separation of between taste and activism is allegedly not SOP at molly moon’s.

While the year of 2020 already ranks as one of the most arduous and dubious stretches of American living over the course of the last century, another victim is claimed by the maelstrom of the ongoing destructive debate. Ice cream was taken to weird and groovy places by Ben and Jerry, however, through the unsavory actions of molly moon’s, the tonic for a hot summer day has completely been stripped of its innocence, and connotations of carefree leisure. Ordering two scoops is now akin to marching on a freeway and donning a sign held high above the head.

 

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