The Golden State beckons evil masterminds from every corner of the globe. While the official civic celebration of cultural and linguistic differences sends long-term residents into an understandable paroxysm of primal envy, and piques the entrepreneurial spirit of career criminals eagerly awaiting the ascent to the big stage and unleashing a cavalcade of insidious schemes and innovative brutality the rest of the nation precariously awaits the influx of devious individuals migrating to different states. The “Californication effect” is not just a catchy gateway lyric bridging the chasm between the Grunge era and modern music, but a ceaselessly complex variable and a simple logical phrase which basically states that “if it happens in California, it will soon happen everywhere”.
The epidemic of ultra-progressive politicians calling for the implementation of Democratic socialistic nationalism, the best of the worst popular culture hipster trends, and a laundry list of crazy celebrities trading a straight jacket for fame, all originated in the most populated state in the union, and like a virulent strain of measles, of course thanks to the anti-vaccine lobby of certain state residents, have reached all corners of the greatest republic on the planet. Throw into the obscure and searing Gumbo recipe a nebula-sized loophole plaguing the penal system which awards convicted murders and kidnappers tax payer funded sex changes, and it just cannot reach a more vile level in chasing the worst of the worst. Or can it?
In order to pinch pennies and resolve a budget crises due to out of control union pension funds and infrastructure, the leadership of the state justice system is now tinkering with automating bail hearings, reports Fox News. As the incessant attack on certain aspects of humanity continues, judges would be replaced by software algorithms in assessing and assigning recommendations for bail. Instead of judge Harrison deciding if a detainee is a flight risk or a threat to society, HAL-25001 armed with an AI smart software core will be held responsible for sifting through data sets in either giving a “yes” with stipulations and figures or a hard “no”. (Thank you for your warnings esteemed Sci-fi author Philip K. Dick and thousands of author dutiful creators.) Clearly, this has to be satire, as it can be argued that code is more susceptible to forming a wayward disposition, than a seasoned magistrate deliberating with the input of facts and emotions. But in the end, the perfected digital justice unit with all the reliability of social networking bots effectively policing behavior profiles falls under the notion that the majority of the bail hearings are cut and dry, and overhead costs will be mitigated so that public servants can retire in relative comfort. In the crazed divisive days of ceaseless rhetoric, it is disgustingly fascinating how certain folks will select the fate and livelihood of circuits and electricity over flesh and blood. It is common knowledge that Chuck Schumer are Mark-IV politicrat droids, but why can’t the love resound from Berkeley?
The evolution of red light camera ticketing has unfortunately breached the legal system, leaving an uncertain future vulnerable to the forced bias of the twitchy and awkward software engineers playing deity in a godless self-serving universe. At least the projected revenues will fund government programs that support special interests and doom the resident who made a mistake three decades ago by defending a love interest against a potential assailant and sparking a bar brawl. However, 30 years of a clean record later, that isolated incident will most likely come back to haunt the individual, especially if taken into custody for an alleged crime, and of course decided by a machine, and not a human.
Common sense in this modern nightmare is only for losers, and a fancy series of equations and a robot brain is not required to substantiate the facts.
Read the Fox News story here.