The burning legacy of the Salem Witch Trials and tribulations is muted as Springtime powers forward to Summer, with the backdrop of an obscure group of extremists trading criminal performance art for their souls.
What has become the most blatantly epic example of the adult “Tide pod” challenge, soon coming to a social media network, violence is at the entrance of the civil unrest pathway, as unstable adults incited (on a good day) and propelled through self-medication and delusions, have succumbed to a zany sect of tribalism (or cult) in the destruction of property and sending a terse warning to Elon Musk.
Tesla owners are the legitimate victims of these trending property crimes, which involves the safety word “keying” sans the dungeon and catacombs of submissive bliss, as strangers stalk and lurk before unleashing their wrath on innocent electronic vehicles simply occupying spaces in parking lots across America. The hate for Elon is real and only enflamed by generations of idiots striving to go viral online despite the consequences of facing the wrath of expensive attorney fees for simply being brainwashed to do the bidding of the countercultural Democrats submerged in cowardice.
Smile. You’re on camera.
Rumors are spinning throughout the digital realm with the force of a Quark scale particle that unrelenting propaganda over that the last four decades has produced a colony of performance artists worshipping their jagged house keys like paintbrushes and documenting history through a mindless attack on certain politics born through cretinous malfeasance. Their acts of brainless defiance burden the legal system and elongate police response times as the sheeple of disruptors ransack the rare and fleeing refugees and basic tenets of commonsense. “Keying” has become the viral opiate of an insane political lobby screaming for the scalp of Musk under the pretense indicative of the confusing times that society faces. In a remote quadrant of the galaxy, Karl Marx wears a smug smile.
A mere five years ago it was obligatory for the average progressive voter on the political spectrum, for the sake of status and street cred, to own a Tesla. Times have certainly changed, as the adverse reaction to the purchase of “X” by the tycoon has crossed the threshold of danger.
Currently, Musk’s fleets of vehicles have phase shifted to a status opposite of civility and prestige as cultural archetypes representing “fascism”, at least to those who self-identify as activists. This movement of aggressive defiance sparked a steady diet of “keying” and in rare cases enhanced Molotov cocktails designed in Central Asia and the warzone of the dubious “Stans”. The environmental impact of suburban warfare in the destruction of Tesla vehicles and charging stations is being monitored and studied with funding provided by the United Nations through global taxpayer currency and Bitcoin futures.
The obsession with “keying” begs the question, why do the robot vandals of indoctrination simply take an ice pick to a Tesla tire, thus costing the owner the price of four new tires? Those on the outlying fringes of the political ledger have resorted to simple self-acts of what can be construed as domestic terrorism in “keying” their own cars to counteract the sheer divine comedy of groupthink which is a symptom of the addiction to validation through social media and the prosperous domains of F***book and TikTok catering to the 15-second attention span of generational detriment.
As filming and selfies dominate the majority of server space within the electronic dreamworld, it is only a matter of time before all vehicles become a blank canvas for the disdain and wrath and disruptors ransacking the purity of basic liberties and freedoms through course and callous vandalism facilitated by the edges of a simple key.
With the deliberate act of property damage forever trapped within the gravity field of enablement, a minor public health crisis is just over the horizon as citizens react to the preventable volatility in the wake of lawlessness.