The putrid consequences of five decades of ideology are finally coming into fruition and are forcefully and shockingly being interwoven with the retail culture. While disciples of the pseudo-intellectual hierarchy incredulously entertain visions of grandeur and indiscriminately drool to vivid scenes of sanctimonious mind porn teeming with dialogue centered around being “the chosen one”, commerce is destroyed by a bombastic firestorm explosion of a self-driving vehicle delivering Beijing certified counterfeit kombucha crashing through the back-front entrance of a genderless salsa dance studio. Elon Musk does not approve of this message.
As the reactionary progressives in the room are stymied with the inherent conundrum of who leads, the confusion created by the ambiguous battle cry of breaking the rules to break the rules in somehow squeezing the remaining equality out of an already obsessive compulsive even playing field, the bizarre transcends and stunts the natural order of human development.
Within this warped variation of frightening reality, not even the tradition and Christmas magic Santa in a controlled setting is safe from the insanity resulting from the exposure to radicalism and the subsequent breach of purgatory. The current viral quandary of a blatant indiscretion in this week’s “can’t believe it happened” moment, a pathetic excuse for a human being on the payroll to assume the roll of Old Saint Nick, took the verbiage right out of the indoctrinating anti-firearm college campus culture of a work study program, in momentarily transforming into a Marxist Scrooge by bestowing a beyond hurtful anti-gift to a little kid simply hoping for season’s greetings from a highly anticipated meeting with what turned out to be a terribly bad Santa. Billy Bob Thorton is reportedly so riled up by the controversy, that a remake to the Christmas comedy instantly materialized from the universal angst resounding angst.
In a startling video shot by the child’s mother, a mall employee donning a Christmas costume can be seen openly propagandizing the boy, in effectively extinguishing the quaint candle flame of holiday miracles and joy, while firing off a salvo of anti-gun rhetoric apparent on a multitude of levels. Apparently, Nerf guns are now the trendy metaphor for real guns, as extremists attempt to politicize a popular toy. In this case, the costumed man lectured to the boy, and not only firmly rebuked the youth’s wish for a Nerf gun under the tree, but implied that Santa is not real, and presents come from dad.
Warning- the following smartphone capture may cause severe bouts of passionate anger, delicious thoughts of vengeance towards the grinch and social justice warriors continuously prodding and pontificating to antagonize law-abiding citizens in a militarized counterproductive campaign against sensibility, and sadness for the innocence brutally stripped from the child by a reckless tyrant.
On a happy note, the boy’s parents received such an overwhelming response to the bah-humbug incident, that a charitable cause was launched, and children of struggling families will find a shining new nerf gun in their stockings.
As for the former employee, who chose unwisely and ungraciously to be “that guy”, his despicable behavior should overanalyzed and made an example of with heavy applications of wisdom and ridicule, as the bar must not be set to allow for any encouragement for future inappropriate and amoral ideological outbursts. A hypothetical worker at a hardware store will certainly not be retained for unleashing a politically correct sermon admonishing Monsanto to a customer wishing to purchase a weed killer or fertilizer, as the expectations for professionalism separate personal viewpoints from acceptable workplace conduct. The faux-Santa now collecting tax-payer and employer funded unemployment benefits has the right to budget is now free schedule to protest guns on the sidewalk bordering the mall, and on the other side, advocates for all varieties of guns, including Nerf toys, are afforded the liberty to crash his 15-seconds of fame on that same stretch of sidewalk by gathering to celebrate the Second Amendment.
Maybe, the season’s malcontent believes in his jaded world that the consumer deity of the holiday season, the Amazon empire, is upping the ante in the high altitude jetways with a battalion of 767 transports, and the real Santa is not conscious of the carbon cost of the new insta-Christmas delivery constraints, or quite possibly he encountered a bout of villain envy, and realized that he would be the subject of the only positive result of this frightening information age in the absence of privacy, and through the objective lens of a perpetual camera. Either way the pie is sliced, there is evidence of cognitive dissonance, and a scarcity of altruism.
Unfortunately, the mall interaction is a result of fifty plus years of social engineering, which has culminated in an adverse revision to the basic set of morals and standards.
In recognition of reason, and to those anticipating a peaceful and wonderful Christmas, leave it to a bunch of DIY geeks to engineer a Nerf gun capable of breaking glass through unbelievable velocities. The pre-Christmas wish of many is that rogue Santa should face the brunt of a suitable punishment incorporating the innovative and powerful technology of flying foam traveling at relativistic speeds.
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